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Johnny was forced to join the band upon departure of second bass player in three days. A consummate musician, being a King’s choral scholar and proficient on every instrument known to man, he plays under an assumed name and with a bag on his head to avoid damage to his professional reputation as a writer, arranger, and producer. In his spare time he saves the universe and supports Liverpool in conjunction with the drummer’s cousin. He plays a pile of debris left behind by his predecessors.
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Andi came to singing later than most and, with no formal training, continues to amaze us all with her voice. She was raised, by wolves, in the New Forest and was unable to make any human-like sounds until the age of nine. She has to be handcuffed to the stage during guitar solos, though it is apparent that she is beginning to enjoy this a little too much..... Andi uses Remy Martin Brandy and Taylor's Port in equal quantities.
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Dave has the dubious honour of holding the title of "Musical Director" for Chocolate Badger. An extremely glamourous role - though no-one is quite sure what the job comprises of. Generally it seems to be the stuff no-one else can be bothered to do..... Not only does he play guitar but he also has a huge range of unusual sound effects at his disposal, all produced using various parts of his body..... Dave uses Gibson guitars and Line 6 amplification. |
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Luckily, Rob does not sing much. In fact we try not to let him sing at all. He is supposed to just sit behind the drums and play them. Another Badger with a very sensible day job, Rob has perfected a slightly bewildered look as well as an interesting and abstract slant on what exactly "keeping time" means!! Rob now has new toys - a new Gretch Drum kit and likes to drink JD whilst playing - he will soon have finished the bottle he started three years ago... |
Not naturally a keyboard player (well not naturally a musician at all), Kev plays keyboards on the basis that you can sit down whilst you play and also it generally leaves one hand free for drinking and smoking. He used to play guitar and sometimes still does, though the rest of the band have managed to limit this to the odd song now and he is no longer allowed to bring a guitar on stage. Currently seeking a sponsorship deal with Becks, Kev uses Roland and Yamaha Keyboards but is not allowed any amplification. |
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The fourteenth Baron Morton of Morton. After Eton, Christ Church, and The Guards, Morton found himself unexpectedly in the music business when his father bought him a record company. His conscription into the band was unusual. His first gig, the now infamous “Farm Shop This Way” concert ended with him being kidnapped by three female members of the audience and held captive at an unknown location for three days. After three years probation in the band, Morton was finally allowed to join the website in September 2010. Morton favours Fender guitars and is currently researching Tinitus. |
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